A friend of mine and I recently decided to do a book study together. I am so thankful that she approached me about this. We just moved to a new town and we only have one working car. I have been unable to take advantage of morning Bible studies. We just started going to a church that is actually a church plant… so they don’t offer much yet in the way of Bible study or book studies.

My friend doesn’t live nearby, but that’s okay. We are planning to read a chapter each week and discuss on the phone or facebook or email… whatever.

The book we are reading is Get Out of That Pit by Beth Moore (I love me some Beth Moore).

I got the book in the mail yesterday and headed to the front porch to do some reading while the kids were having quiet time.

The book is all about God’s deliverance. Now… I have been a Christian for over half of my life. I am supposed to be a “mature” believer by now. I am supposed to have a handle on things… but I don’t. My walk with the Lord has taken a real hit in the last few years. I have often described it as being stuck… being barely able to function… barely keeping my head above water. When my friend (who has her own story and own struggles) approached me about reading something together, I immediately suggested this book.

Here are my thoughts from Chapter One (Life in the Pit):

Maybe you’re the noble type trying to make the most of your pit. You keep wondering why you can’t get satisfied there. Why aren’t you mature enough to be content where you are. After all, didn’t the apostle Paul tell us that we should learn to be content in any circumstance?”

This is how the first chapter begins. I was struck from the very first paragraph. This so describes my thoughts during the time my husband was in seminary. I felt stuck and felt so immature for not being able to make the best of it. I figured that this must be what God had for me and I better try my hardest to make the best of it.

I’ve come to the conclusion that vastly more people are miserable than not. Far more feel defeated than victorious… tens of thousands would confess that ‘it’ doesn’t work as well as they’d hoped. Masses of believers are totally bewildered- if not in outright despair.

Why is this? Why are believers so miserable? Aren’t we the ones who are supposed to be filled with joy and hope because of the promise of the cross? Aren’t we supposed to be the ones who set our sights on things eternal? Maybe it is the inability to reconcile what goes on in this world while waiting for the next. Maybe it is the inability to reconcile the suffering (both personal and worldwide) that is a direct result of sin. Maybe it is the giving up of control over our hopes and dreams. I mean… shouldn’t there be comfort in knowing that God has our best interest at heart and that His dreams for our lives are so much greater than our own?

You know your in a pit when

You feel stuck… check

You can’t stand up… check

You’ve lost vision… check

Dim vision ages us rapidly, and we lose the childlikeness that                  once made us feel like real princes and princesses in a kingdom. We can be young yet feel old. Heavy Laden. Burdened.

My husband read the blog post from yesterday about why I revamped the blog. He commented that he wished I would share these thoughts out loud with him. I told him that I prefer to write. He made a comment then that struck me… he said… I don’t really know what you believe unless you tell me. I mean.. I know we share a common faith.. but that’s all I know.

He and I used to talk… used to have visions together for our marriage, our children, our mission. It’s no fault on his part… I just quit sharing my thoughts somewhere along the way. I just stopped looking forward and started trying to survive the day to day.

I feel stuck. I feel immobilized and I have lost my vision. Maybe just the realization and recognition of all this is just where I need to start.

Thank goodness for this promise:

He lifted me out of the pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet upon a rock

and gave me a firm place to stand.

Psalm 40:2

What I am Reading – Get out of That Pit

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