I wish I could wake up every morning at 5:30 AM to the sound of my 16 month old crying and have my first thought be “oh, I’m so thankful for that sweet little blessing!” I have, at times, felt so guilty when I read facebook statuses of people who sing the praises of their children and just go on and on about how blessed they are. People tell me that I need to treasure the little years because they go so quickly…. to enjoy every moment.
Like the moment when everyone in the house was sound asleep except for the 16 month old who was screaming and climbing all over me because she wanted to play. And then, when I gave her a waffle to quiet her down, she proceeded to grind it into my shirt, hair and the sofa we were sitting on.
Or like when my children came stumbling, sleepy eyed out on Mothers Day morning and immediately asked for food and tv instead of lavishing me with Mothers Day greetings, homemade cards, etc.
Or when, later that day, I was stuck in the bathroom of the posh country club that my parents belong to… changing a stinky (and I mean stinky) diaper with NO wipes. I texted for help as I sat there on the floor (because there was no changing table) and waited and waited and waited for help to come!
Am I really expected to treasure those moments?… covered in waffles? covered in poop?
Don’t get me wrong… I love my children. I adore my children. I can’t imagine life without my children. They have taught me so much about myself and about the love and patience that the Heavenly Father lavishes upon me. I am amazed at how they love me, despite the fact that I might be covered in waffles… and poop. I enjoy watching them play. I love to hear the games they make up. I love reading to them and teaching them… hiking with them, exploring the world with them. I do love being a mom.
I want to be a mom who, while picking up the dirty clothes from the floor or putting shoes in the shoe basket for the tenth time that day or washing dishes, again can say “I am so thankful for the little hands that made these messes.” “I am so thankful for the food that went on these plates and filled our bellies” “I am so thankful for the sweaty little feet that ran around in these stinky little shoes.”… But quite honestly… I’m just not always in that frame of mind.
I am constantly getting on to my eight year old about how ungrateful he is… about everything! Perhaps I should swallow that pill, take my own medicine and check out my own heart. You would think that being thankful would come easily. There are so many ways in which we are blessed each day… but thankfulness really is discipline that must be practiced often.
Ok… I get it… I need to stop looking at the sippy cup as being half empty and train myself to see it as half full. I need to stop thinking about the sleep I’m missing and start thinking about the time I’m getting with my littlest snuggle bug. Stop thinking about the dirt on the floor, counters, sink and start thinking more of the ones who are behind all that tom- foolery!
After the waffles and poop yesterday, my husband took us all to a flea market… because I love yard sales… he let me loose… all by myself to peruse and purchase at will. He took the kids and let them pick out gifts from me. How can I not be thankful for that.. and check out these awesome gifts: