When we live in relationship with each other, we have to recognize that we all approach life through our own unique set of lenses and experiences. We all approach situations differently… that doesn’t necessarily mean one person is right and one person is wrong… it’s just different.
When I share on this blog about things like the 5 Love Languages or other personality inventories… I only share to indicate how beautifully different we all are. I do not share so that you can hem someone in to a box… “Oh… you’re a gifts person” or “Well… of course you act like that.. you’re an introvert!”
I really like personality inventories because I like knowing that I’m not a freak.. and if my personality is listed… then surely it’s because I’m not the only one!
Anyway… I really like the book, The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts. The premise is that we all have a primary language through which we receive love and through which we show love. I am a gifts person. I love buying and making things for people. I am a horrible sales person because I just give stuff away. My husband is NOT a gifts person… as you can image, that caused a bit of a rub in our early years of marriage. I would buy my husband tokens of affections that I thought he SHOULD want… but in fact, he didn’t. We had to learn how to speak and receive each other’s language.
I actually enjoy gifts, acts of service and words of affirmation… and those have seemed to change depending on the season of life I am in. Now that I have 4 kids, ages 10 and under… having my husband cook dinner or load the dishwasher is a huge act of love for me!
I found a couple of charts on Pinterest that I think are really great for explaining what the love languages look like- how to love and what to avoid.
This one is for general use:
This one is more kid specific:
Don’t know what your love language is? You can take the inventory HERE.